I remember reading about a study where children were asked to do a job and then pay themselves what they think it was worth, it might have been with candy or something like that, but what was shocking was the women paid themselves 30 – 80 percent less than the boys did.
Women find themselves often recognizing the problems we face as a group, but all too often we exclude ourselves from being victims of double standards. This is called “denial of personal disadvantage’ and it is common among women that aren’t living up to their potential, not coming into being the best version of themself, and not getting what they want out of life.
How many people are unhappy with something in their life and just assume it can’t be changed? I challenge everyone to take a good look at the possibilities in their life and see what you wish was different, whether it’s a hobby you gave up or a career path you wish you’d pursued.
There are concrete ways you can negotiate your way to happiness, whether it’s at home or work. Women have a natural ability to negotiate win/win solutions, or interest-based solutions. Sometimes all you have to do is approach an issue with a solution-focused, collaborative mindset.
On the flip side, women have a tendency to withhold feelings and desire for change until it reaches a critical tipping point. This is toxic behavior that results in pent up resentment and can cause a relationship fallout where a positive solution could have been achieved.
If I could speak directly to a woman out there thinking about making a big change in her career or marriage, I’d say life is too short and too precious to not be happy. No matter what, you deserve the change you want to see happen. You deserve to be your best self. Starting today if possible.
If you live in Bergen County, New Jersey, and may be facing the possibility of divorce, to learn more, ask questions, and seek advice from a Bergen County divorce lawyer Sheena Burke Williams Esq. a call at (201) 497-8700.
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