Living in New Jersey: How to Know if a Divorce is Right for You

Are you wondering if you should stay married, or if you should part ways? Divorce is not an easy decision, and depending on your situation, it may not be an easy process either. Many times, the decision to divorce is based on emotions and both parties are not on the same page. That’s why it is important to carefully decide whether or not a divorce is right for you. In order to help you make the right choice, it is recommended that you ask yourself these three questions:

  1. Do you still have feelings for your partner? Sometimes, people who desire a divorce still have feelings for their husband or wife. The feelings may be strong or diminishing, but they are feelings nonetheless. People who desire a divorce may experience a lack of closeness or intimacy. These issues can be worked out. It is recommended to seek therapy to work through these minor issues. However, when you think about your spouse and constantly harbor ill feelings toward him/her, it may be time to seek a family lawyer near you and file for a divorce. Also, if the environment is toxic, draining, and abusive, that is another indicator that divorce is the best option.
  1. Is your decision emotionally-driven, or based on self-awareness? Meaning, are you seeking a divorce because of minor disagreements, or because deep down inside, you know this is the best decision for you? Emotions can get the best of us and cause us to think and behave irrationally. It is important that you have little to no emotional attachment to your spouse, otherwise the divorce process can be difficult and dreadful. You know you are ready for a divorce when you can make a clear, unemotional decision regarding your spouse. Furthermore, when you are at peace with your decision to divorce is another indicator that you have made the right choice. 
  1. What is your intention? In some cases, couples marry for the wrong reason. As a result, they pursue a divorce hoping for a “quick fix” to end the marriage. Also, they divorce solely because of monetary gain.  Some couples even threaten to divorce hoping their spouse will change and start treating them better. Their intention is to make them realize how much they’ll lose and to pay for the pain caused while married. However, the only thing a divorce does is end a marriage. It is not guaranteed that your spouse will change his/her ways, grant you half of their possessions, or treat you better because you are demanding a divorce.

In closing, you will know when a divorce is the right decision for you when you and your spouse are on the same page, you have no emotional attachment to him/her, and your intentions are clear. A divorce is a life-altering moment, and it should not be taken lightly. Be mindful to take the necessary time to find a top family lawyer near you, and determine whether or not this is the right move for you.

If you live in Bergen County, New Jersey, and are facing a divorce, to learn more, ask questions, and seek advice, you can call the BURKE WILLIAMS, LLC family law office at (201) 497-8700. We’d love to talk.


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