Surviving Your First Valentine’s Day After a Divorce

Single, unmarried people may feel like they have it rough because they have to spend Valentine’s Day alone. However, we rarely hear about individuals who were once married to the love of their lives, and now newly divorced. If this is you, your first Valentine’s Day after a divorce does not have to be dreadful nor disappointing. Following these three steps will help you to survive your first Valentine’s Day alone:

Stay off Social Media

We understand this may be easier said than done. However, you must actively stay away from social media on February 14th. Give your phone to someone, log off of your account(s), or remove the app from your phone altogether. Social media can be a trigger for you if you were once accustomed to spending Valentine’s Day with your former spouse. Viewing couples up and down your timeline, engagement photos, and even pictures of anniversaries could arise. If you are not prepared to handle seeing that, it is highly recommended to give social media a break and find another activity to occupy your time.

Practice Self-Care

During Valentine’s Day as a new divorcee, there may be more time in your schedule to devote to taking care of yourself. With this said, book a spa day, watch movies, or read a good book. Log into a virtual event promoting Galentine’s Day, or you could even order take-out from a quality restaurant in Bergen County to enjoy a candlelight dinner by yourself.  Also, remember, self-care can mean doing absolutely nothing but resting. Whatever your method of self-care is, please be sure to implement it to the fullest. You deserve it.

Show Love to Friends and Family

Instead of focusing on feeling “lonely” or unloved, reach out to family and friends on Valentine’s Day. It is proven that when we act selflessly and genuinely give our time and resources to someone else, it elevates our mood. There are many ways to express love to others and here are a few examples:

  • Mail a handwritten letter to someone you admire and let them know how much they’ve impacted your life
  • Send flowers to a close family member or friend for Valentine’s Day
  • Create a Zoom meeting and invite other single friends or colleagues to spend Valentine’s Day with you

These activities will redirect the stress of being single on Valentine’s Day, and will place emphasis on surviving and embracing singleness on this day…and hopefully, many days proceeding.


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